I wannas sexs uuuuu
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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