I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
