He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
