Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
