grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
she smelled like a LAN party
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
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