Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Can I color on your dick again?
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
