i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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