I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
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