I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
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