YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
