exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize