I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
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