Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize