She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize