he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize
