Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
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