Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
