Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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