Welp...herpes.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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