I'm eating all of the evidence.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
