Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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