I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
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