Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
She even gives head with a lisp.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Randomize
