i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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