I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Every concussion has its silver lining
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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