just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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