I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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