she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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