People in love make me want to vomit
love makes seman taste better
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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