How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize