I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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