It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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