Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
