omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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