So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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