he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize