I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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