why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize