Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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