That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I just threw up on my dentist
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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