Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
You can't motorboat a personality
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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