no one should ever give us hovercrafts
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
