Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
