This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
