drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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