I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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