I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize