why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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