shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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