this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize